A Month of Quarantine: A daily log of parenting part 2

A Month of Quarantine:

A daily log of Parenting Part 2

I have been keeping a Facebook log of my time at home during quarantine. I decided to do this mostly because 1. We didn’t know how long this would last, so a log helped me keep track of the days, and 2. I wanted a way to remember all the crazy, silly, fun, infuriating, and hopeless things I was feeling as a parent during this time. This is a compilation of the first month.

I chose to end each post with #stayinside or #staysafe because it seemed appropriate given our orders to stay away from others during this time.

These are my unfiltered thoughts full of humor, frustration, anger, and obscurity. I think many parents can relate.

Enjoy.

Day 32: It snowed again today. Snow that stuck to the ground. On April 14th. I know it could be worse, but that stinks.

Saw a cardinal and a blue jay each hunting for worms in the yard. Blue jay 3, cardinal 2.

I miss baseball.

We began discussing our next trip to the store. So far the counterpart and I have each gone exactly one time in a month. We find that the milk supplies is really the determining factor. Also the puzzle supplies. Seriously. I never thought I’d count the days until we start the next puzzle.

#stayinside

Day 33: Today is the first day since the start of quarantine that I sent the offspring to their rooms. Not for anything they did wrong, they just needed a break from each other and I needed a break from them. They came back down refreshed and ready to continue the slow and unceasing march toward wearing down our defenses.

As I wrote that first part, the little one came in and said, “Evie just kicked me right in the chin!” The counterpart responded with, “Ok. Go back in and keep playing.” So I guess that’s the stage we’re in now.

There were protests today at the capitol building regarding the shelter-in-place orders. There are reports and pictures of the protestors blocking ambulances trying to reach the hospital. I just…

#stayinside

Day 34: Favorite meal tonight: leftovers. Not my favorite because it’s anything special. It simply empties out the fridge of all the containers. It’s a beautiful sight to behold a container free refrigerator. It’s arguably my most dadish quality.

The older one gave me a GREAT idea for a potential at-home project for the high school kids. She doesn’t know it. I’m undecided whether or not to give her credit. Most likely will. Grudgingly.

The offspring have decided to leave the door open every time they go into the backyard. Almost yelled, “are we TRYING to heat the outside!” after this last time. The words caught in my throat. All the dadness is coming to the surface today.

Time to sign off. I’ve got to run around the house to turn all the lights off. Lord, beer me strength.

#stayinside

Day 35: Operation “Empty the Pantry” was successful. Almost no food left in the fridge either. Virtual high five to my unit. We didn’t even resort to eating mustard sandwiches. Yet.

While the counterpart and I were both working this afternoon, the little one came into my office space wearing nothing but her underpants. She was covered in a substance that was not immediately identifiable. Turns out she can reach the lotion on top of her dresser. Think of the most lotion you have ever seen on a person, then double it. She was coated in 3 times that amount.

Preparing to leave for the store this evening. Gloves, masks, sanitizer and machete are at the ready. Goal is to make it yet another 2 weeks. How much milk is too much?

#stayinside

Day 35 (part 2): First ever sequel. Back from the store. That was the most uncomfortable, hot, unpleasant shopping trip ever. Lots of some things. None of many things. Not fun trying to find substitutes for a household with wheat, egg, and nut allergies.

The kids went to bed tonight with an empty fridge and pantry. They will wake up with both full to bursting. Parents are the santas or groceries. “And what do you want for quarantine little one? Chex and some bagels!? Well if you’ve been moderately good and don’t drive your parents crazy, the Spirit of Quarantine will leave them for you in your quarantine galoshes.”

#stayinside

Day 36: Spent a lot of time outside today. Caught up with one of the neighbor units. All healthy and happy. Talking over the fence has never felt so good. I understand Wilson from Home Improvement better than ever.

I feel a beer in my future. The sun, the warmth, and the yard work feel like Spring. I miss baseball and golf. I wonder how upset the neighbors would be if I started chipping balls through the fence?

I broke the offspring’s baseball set. Took one swing with the bat and it exploded like a bad movie effect. Had to make a decision. Do I play it off like I’m super dad, or immediately act contrite? Chose the former. Still some tears, but the older one was mostly amazed. Didn’t get into the science of leaving plastic out in the cold, changing temps all winter. Maybe that’ll be the science lesson next week.

#stayinside

Day 37: Some stressful moments today. Sent the older one to her room 2 different times related to sass and rudeness. I know it happens, especially when you are around the same people, every day, with no break, for over a month. Still, everyone ends up feeling bad.

Weird question. Anyone else developing a strange behavior or symptom that is only quarantine related? I may have a Mario Kart related callus forming on my thumb. We usually play one or twice a day after dinner. The counterpart thinks that is embarrassing. I feel a little proud.

A month ago I ordered a pack of Planters Cheeseballs. They were on back order and I forgot about them. They arrived Friday. 12 100-cheeseball containers in all their glory. We have already eaten 2 containers.

#stayinside

Day 38: Today was a recovery day after a rough weekend. Reworking plans for the offspring to accomplish new things each day. The older one is back on track. The younger one thought it was me singing “Born to Run” on Alexa during dinner. Could be worse. I’ll take The Boss.

We got outside to enjoy the only nice day this week. I did while sitting on the patio after the offspring were finished with school work. The older one began filling in the stones with different colored chalks. Now we have, as the little one dubbed it, “our own rainbow road.” (In typical Michigan fashion, roadwork to be finished at a later date)

You can tell you have been in isolation too long when you start seeing faces in the objects around your house. These are my glasses after we finished dinner. Is it just me?

#stayinside

Day 39: The older one did a great job with school work today. I sat down with her and learned some Mandarin from her world languages teacher. The first part of the lesson was dedicated to tonal inflection and the cultural reverence for teachers. I remember trying to get my mom’s attention in class by saying “mom.” Almost never worked. I always reverted to “MRS. ROSE!” (All caps and punctuation very much intended)

At dinner the counterpart and I told the offspring that kids cereal boxes used to come with cool prizes. Some REAL cool ones if you saved enough proof of purchase. Why did that stop? That happened and we let it happen. If ever there was a time to reinstitute cool prizes, now is that time. I’m looking at you General Mills, Kellogg, and Post.

Ironically, the little one loves Chex. She’s gone through more than a box in 4 days. So maybe Chex could offer a prize too. Like cash.

#stayinside

Day 40: Decided on comfort food tonight. Goulash for days. Makes me think of family dinners growing up. If only my brother and sister were here too. We could argue about doing dishes just like the old days.

I hung a turtle on the wall tonight. Her name is Donna. She looks good. May be the new centerpiece for the living room.

Had a little issue with the older one today. It involved about a pound worth candy wrappers tucked under her pillow. Turns out our secret stash wasn’t so secret. Or inaccessible. Ramifications of candygate are forthcoming. I’m leaning toward an ankle monitor. Or laps.

#stayinside

Day 41: At lunch the older one suggested, when we are finally free to shop and go out into the community again, that we should celebrate. My counterpart said we should buy new underpants. Therefore, I proclaim that when freedom arrives, we will all head out and purchase celebratory underpants! Mine will be Captain America. Maybe Batman.

One thing I did not expect from quarantine is that we are now all on a first name basis with coworker’s pets. The counterpart said she felt left out because our fuzzy guy has been excluded from all video calls to this point.

Today was a theme day in our house. Dinner was the culmination of events. The older one and I made these trays. If you don’t know, you don’t know.

#stayinside

Day 42: We have read the Crayon books every night before bedtime this week. I really love those books. They give me a chance to work on all my voices. My Christopher Walken is really coming along. I also appreciate the crayon’s angst and anxiety. I relate to pea green. I mean, who doesn’t consider changing their name to Esteban the Magnificent and leaving all responsibilities to see the world?

The counterpart and I have successfully hung about a dozen pictures, photos, and art around the house this week. Not to brag, but we have done so without fighting once.

Today was stuffed animal theme day (chosen by the older one). Blankets and stuffed animals covered the living room floor all day. The dog is very sad now that it is cleaned up. I guess his blanket, bed, doormats, and our laps aren’t quite enough.

#stayinside

Day 43: Does anyone else have a go-to quarantine outfit? I’m basically living in a rotation of 4 sweatshirts, but as soon as my church sweatshirt is clean, I put it on.

More yard work today. The dog dug a 3ft x 2ft x 1ft hole in the garden next to the house. That’s new. He was properly scolded and then given cuddles because the older one felt bad he was scolded. The old “positive reinforcement for bad behavior” routine will surely do wonders in the future.

I swear to all that is holy and good, if the offspring argue one more time about who will be Puppit in the Hatchimals game I am going to LOSE IT, flip the board, and throw Puppit out the friggin’ window. It almost makes me long for Candy Land. Almost.

#stayinside

Day 44: Our yard has never looked nicer. I’m not wishing away the youth of the offspring, but the quality of the landscaping makes me delirious for a yard that is not filled with 14 balls, 2 Frisbees, 3 bubble containers (1 of which was unceremoniously dumped over the edge of the deck onto the blueberry bush), and a children’s golf set with broken driver (head now used as a weapon).

Saw the in-laws for a little bit. Everyone stayed outside, kept their distance, and they wore masks. Got help dislodging a dead branch from a tree hanging over the hammock. A potential death blow from above. Manly men doing manly things!

We have put a moratorium on the phrase, “I don’t care,” in our house. I just said the forbidden phrase during a heated moment of the nightly Mario Kart competition. The little one said, “dad, you just said, ‘I don’t care.’ I’m mad at you. Say you’re sorry.” I apologized. We may have created a monster. Classic parenting overthink.

#stayinside

Day 45: Great day of school and work for the unit. Getting on track with both now that the novelty of all this has worn off. Changed the settings on the older one’s google classroom. Got a little sick of her getting 25 emails a day about assignments. As a second grader. Hopefully this should improve her anxiety.

The little one has started asking the counterpart for permission after getting a definitive answer seconds prior from me; or vis versa. At dinner she requested more food for a 5th time. (Both girls are going through growth spurts and eating 4 lbs. of food at every meal. Which is great when you’re trying to ration things during a quarantine.) The counterpart said no, then the little one looked up at me with the biggest puppy dog eyes you’ve ever seen. Luckily, I am immune to such things thanks to the practice on the older one.

The little one grabbed my finger after finishing her meal and said, “I’m going to play a game. It’s called bite the hand.” She proceeded to, somewhat playfully, attempt to bite my finger. Perhaps we should have given her 5ths after all.

#stayinside

Day 46: Sweet and spicy rub chicken legs for dinner. We ate them too quickly to get a picture. Turns out the little one loves edamame. That’s cool with me. I’ll stuff her full of cheap soy every day. Getting down there on side dishes before our next bi-weekly trip to the store Saturday evening. If I make tacos tomorrow, do mini tacos count as a side?

Fresh mulch was delivered this morning. Used every last bit to fill in the front and back flower beds. Our yard has never look so nice. The offspring both “helped” for 20 minutes. The older one complained of back pain and left to lay in the hammock. I was tempted to flip her out.

Had my first real cooking fail of quarantine. Turns out you cannot use gluten free “baking” flour to make a standard Pinterest muffin recipe. Also turns out they give you a muffin recipe on the bag with a much lower cooking temp and time. Turns out I didn’t read that. They actually didn’t taste terrible, for flat soufflé, cookie things.

#stayinside

Day 47: Today was a really rough day for the older one. She didn’t save an assignment she completed, so she had to redo it. She has been close to a breaking point with stress for a solid week. It came today. We had a full hour and a half conversation with her about all the things that stink about this situation. Saying everything aloud is, of course, therapeutic. Thank goodness for Disney Plus and Beauty and the Beast to keep the little one occupied. I think we all feel much better this evening.

On a much happier note, say hello to the new family cousins! We could not be happier. The counterpart and I both had tears in our eyes as the pictures and news of their birth came at the end of our conversation with the older one. Congratulations Amanda, Tom, Aunt Paula, Uncle Steve and family! Mason and Maxwell are so lucky to have you as parents and grandparents.

#stayinside

Day 48: The older one did great job with her school work today while I finished up a set of lessons for work. I remember the days in high school and early college when a 6-page paper seemed daunting. A fantastic English teacher and the necessity to write 3 such papers a week for my intro college English class helped me improve considerably. One and a half hours, 3000 words, and only 3 interruptions by the little one later, I was able to move on to other projects.

Leaving the domicile tomorrow! I am heading out to drop off the prizes for the church Easter Egg hunt. One family found 137! An excellent effort. A total which only slightly pales in comparison to our own efforts of 203. I withdrew us from competition, however, based on our superior egg hunting skills; and the fact that I work there, I guess.

I think we may be playing too much Mario Kart. The older one began dinner prayer this evening, instead of with the sign-of-the-cross, by touching her forehead and shoulders and quite subconsciously saying, “3-2-1…” I like the idea of, “3-2-1-Jesus,” although it sounds as though there may be a holy explosion at the end.

#stayinside

Day 49: The older one was so excited to leave the house that, when I finished showering at 8:30, she had already completed all her homework and made her parental unit’s breakfast (the muffin disasters) and coffee. I ended up taking both offspring on a half hour trip around Midland to deliver prizes. They never left the car, but at least they left the house.

Today’s theme was “gift day.” The little one got a new baseball set to replace the one I exploded. The bigger one got a Pokémon card set. We’re trying to encourage some independent play time. Our gift? Some peace and quiet for the counterpart to work. Some time in the hammock and sunshine for me this afternoon. The Spirit of Quarantine still owes me some scotch.

The little one continues to amaze with the truly Polyphemus-like (Polyphemian?) effort at meals. She easily ate more than the older one at each meal and close to the same amount as us. I mean, we are down to our last vestiges of rice and beans. We’ve made it 15 days with only the 3 meals tomorrow remaining before an evening shopping trip. Rise above! Stay united! Eat a meal of soy sauce and peas if we have to!!

#stayinside

Day 50: It’s happened. We have entered Prairie times. We had a well-used childrens car out by the curb in hopes that someone would take it before trash day. Lady knocked on the door at 9am. I told her it was hers if she wants it. She left and came back 20 minutes later with a jar of honey from her backyard bee farm as a thank you. We traded a toy for fresh honey! Tomorrow I hope to trade in the old wagon wheel to get some medicine for our old ‘coon hound, Zeke.

The counterpart is headed out for the next shopping trip. We made it 16 days. Our fridge and freezer are SHOCKINGLY empty. We all took guesses as to how much we would spend on this trip. I think we all lowballed in hopes that we misjudged. For starters, we have 7 boxes of cereal on the list. I’m not sure that’ll be enough.

Want to see what working from home looks like on our phone bill? Check out the Data and Text categories February-March (left) vs. March-April (right). My number is the second line. Data, way down. Thanks constant Wi-Fi. Texts?

#stayinside

Day 51: Lots of time outdoors today: garden work, bike ride, grilling, cleaning the garage, washing the cars. Felt like a real “May” kinda day. It’s great seeing all the green in the gardens and on the trees. Prepping to plant the veggies on Mother’s Day. Thank goodness the Spirit of Quarantine brought our groceries last night. We won’t be serving the counterpart bark and grass trimmings for her Mother’s Day dinner.

While outside the dog chased a chipmunk up the gutter spout. It took a few minutes to corral the pup and the offspring, then I took apart the spout and, to my bemusement, came face to butt with the tail end of the rodent. As the counterpart ran to grab me gloves, the dog managed to edge the screen door open and came tearing around the corner. With a well-placed foot and a scolding yell I managed to hold him off but only after he grabbed the wee cheek-stuffer by the tail. The little guy wriggled free and escaped under the fence to the front yard where he immediately ran, you guessed it, up the next available spout. At least now, with the pup penned, I managed to get the puny pest loose once more. Unfortunately, once free again, he sought shelter within the waiting confines of the open garage. We never saw him again. You win this round ‘munk.

The older one beat the counterpart and me at our first real go at Monopoly. She beat me, in a shortened version of the game, by $13. I saved her $500 during her last turn by talking her out of a barter with the counterpart. I regret everything.

#stayinside

Day 52: Happy Star Wars Day. The offspring both wore costumes all day. The big one was Rey. The little one was a storm trooper. Both are fitting. The big one is frustrated about the unclear path ahead during all the craziness. Similar to the actual stormies, it seems like there are a billion of the little one at times. She also can’t hit anything she aims at; the potty, the crayon bag, the hamper for dirty clothes…

Back at the work-from-home and school schedules. Really hoping we are able to stick to the schedule for the older one. The last two weekdays for the older one were much better. She is craving some sense of control. You know it’s bad when there is an argument about which game we should play which ends in tears, name calling, and stomping for half an hour. This happened last Wednesday. We didn’t even play a game.

Now that we have food again, I decided to make an actual list of the lunch and dinner plans for the next week. Two reasons. 1. I think the unit is sick of me asking at the end of every dinner, “Well, what are we doing for food tomorrow, gang?” 2. It helps me organize the freezer meat. I’m still not sick of cooking, but I feel the eyes on me when I talk about it.

#stayinside

Day 53: The little one was full of it today. After lunch she randomly started Mario Kart on her own. I walked past and asked, “who said you could start that?” She responded, “EVIE!” so quickly I am sure she was waiting for me to ask. The older one then replied, “No I didn’t!” with a righteous defensiveness that would have disarmed the finest debater.

For the final hour of the work day, the counterpart left the home office to enjoy the sunshine and work at the kitchen table. The older one has also chosen the afternoon as her work time for school. As they both sat working, the little on decided to “work” on her learning tablet, a toy with a computerized screen. Working with a 3 year next to you is kind of like doing physics with an angry chimp screaming in your ear. Did you know someone could press a vocalized “B” key 147 times uninterrupted?

Loaded Nachos for dinner. Mexican tequila slushes for adult beverages. Happy Cinco de Mayo.

#stayinside

Day 54: Animal day. We each made our lunch to look like animals. I created sheep out of pita bread, cottage cheese, blueberries, and tomatoes. The counterpart did a snake out of tortilla chips, guacamole, hot sauce and blueberries. The older one did an elaborate cucumber giraffe eating berries out of a cracker tree. The younger one was napping and did not participate. She did, however, enjoy pretending to eat my face with goldfish crackers for her afternoon snack. Her exact words were, “Well, the fish is going to eat your eye now.” So that’s cool.

We took an evening stroll around the yard as a unit. I mean, it’s nice out with all the green, but all I really notice are all the dead branches stuck in upper limbs of our many trees. They’re like death javelins from above waiting to skewer one the of offspring. And with that that sentence you have seen me complete the metamorphosis into my father…

The older one is functioning so much better with this new “your choice work time” for school. Every kid is different, but this worked really well for her and for us.

#stayinside

Day 55: The older one is learning the art of sarcasm better at home than she ever could at school. I make this statement whilst having a family full of teachers, including my mother, so I do not say it lightly. We have been attempting to earn gold trophies and three stars on all Mario Kart races. After we finished no higher than third overall in the final race of the night, the older one stared contemptuously at us and spat, “well, that was really an improvement.” Whew.

The older one also won a family game recently and, as a reward, got to choose dinner one night this week. She chose Bob Evans. Our unit has ordered food 2 times in almost 2 months, both times pizza, so this is a real treat. While finishing dinner tonight, we all started having delusions of all the ordering options for tomorrow. Seems prudent to order something I wouldn’t make. Usually that means a baked good considering all the gluten free things we usually have. I think, however, a chicken fried steak is calling to me. And maybe a pie. May biscuits and gravy… I may have to set a 4 item per person limit on the order. Otherwise Bob Evans is getting a $100 dinner order, before tip.

The counterpart aptly compared the choices for our Bob Evans dinner to turning in your tickets at the arcade. How many items can we get for 200 tickets? The ratio is 10 tickets to 1 side of glazed carrots. I need to find a conversion chart for meat.

#stayinside

Day 56: The little one went upstairs to use the potty during dinner. After about 5 minutes we hear, “Hurley, don’t do that!” Naturally I say, “What happened?” An unseen, tiny, frustrated voice replies, “He licked my underwear!” Little did I know this was only the beginning of the evening events.

We followed through and ordered $65 worth of Bob Evans. This included breakfast food for three of us for tomorrow. It was everything we hoped for and more. I also didn’t need to cook anything!

After dinner was crazy town. We treated the offspring to orange juice with their meals; the first sugary beverage of any kind in months. Let me lay the scene: We finished eating. The little one ran to the back door, grabbed some winter gloves (which were out because it snowed today, on May 8th) and a pair of the older one’s shoes, put everything on and proceeded to clomp around the house as loudly as possible. The bigger one chose this time to run around the living room and literally bounce off the furniture while holding up her dress and screaming, “Look at my belly!” At this moment the animal we allow to live with us decided to join the mix and tossed his squeak toy into the fray, shaking and squeaking as loudly as possible. The counterpart and I shared a look of exasperation, thinking of our forthcoming adult beverages. Or at least I was.

#stayinside

Day 57: The unit was on edge today. Don’t know if it’s the end of the week blues or the pressure to perform for Mother’s Day. The offspring both had their moments. I’m excited for an upcoming game. Hopefully that will change moral.

I went this morning to pick up a special dessert for tomorrow. The line outside this particular bakery was INCREDIBLY long. I hate to say it, but they all looked like married, middle aged dudes. A guy behind me asked if I knew what I was going to get. To steal a line from one of my favorite Twitter follows, I looked the rival dad straight in the face and said, “Yeah. I placed a special order a week ago.” We didn’t talk after that.

A coworker recommended I submit my first month of daily quarantine updates to the Saginaw Art museum for a special COVID project with the goal to record this time period. I received a message for the director of the project saying they would like to use my writing. So that’s cool. The director’s name did not disappoint my expectation of what I expect an art museum director should be. His first name is that of a Norse god. Or a marvel hero.

#stayinside

Day 58: Happy Mother’s Day. I have been very fortunate to have many different, wonderful mothers in my life. The world would be an astonishing place if all mothers were as kind and caring as those whom I am lucky to call family and friends.

We had a wonderful day full of good food, a family movie, activities, and games. The older one decorated with streamers, homemade signs, and cards. The only thing that would have made the day better would be to actually see our own mothers.

A gift for the counterpart did not arrive in time (ordered April 27th). The older one was worried the counterpart would have nothing to open, so she chose to package up some things of her own. She gifted a book she had already read, a plastic bracelet, a paper snowflake, and a plastic rainbow ring. Each will be cherished.

The happiest of Mother’s Days to all you moms.

#stayinside

Day 59: I just finished my last Zoom. I had over 4 hrs. worth of zooms today. I didn’t even know what Zoom was until two months ago. How did Skype, FaceTime, and other platforms get passed up so quickly? Regardless, it was great to see so many faces today.

The whole unit was back on the job today. Combined we spent about 8 hours on video calls. The older one has taken to her new schedule like gang busters. I think a virtual play date may be in the future. Hard to believe this will be a thing for the foreseeable future.

The first of the late Mother’s Day gifts arrived today. Let the in home gardening begin! Also, we got back to puzzling. The counterpart is keeping track. Looks like we are up to 17 now. Things I did not expect to be a premium during a pandemic: toilet paper, yeast, puzzles, outside time, Wi-Fi, milk, more time with family, more alone time, any number of outdoor activities. I hope the little one continues to be oblivious to all this.

#stayinside

Day 60: A black and white invader visited the yard last night. It happens a few times a year. This time Doug (as he will forevermore be known, as he dug the crap out of the front yard looking for bugs) sprayed directly under our bedroom window. The stench was nearly palpable. I realized, as I got up to check the yard, that I had left the garage open. I ran to close it and the noise, of course, caused the counterpart and the older one to both get up. The dog was on high alert for the next two hours. I know firsthand. Doug disappeared into the night.

Went back into the office today for the first time in nearly two months. It was cold and dark and empty. Took care of business and was in and out in about 40 minutes. Two coworkers lost relatives to COVID in the past 24 hours. I have a feeling the office will continue to be closed for quite a while.

The little one has entered a new phase of conversational language. She is able to start and continue a conversation. Her favorite topics are the Disney sing-a-longs, food, which Mario Kart player you like to be, your favorite color/animal/food/sandwich color (not a typo), Daniel Tiger, and others. Can’t wait until we can discuss baseball, cooking, golf, books, science, and faith. Give it another 3 or 4 years.

#stayinside

Day 61: Fighting a headache all afternoon. Stiff neck. If there is one thing we need at home, it’s a good office chair or standing desk. I know I hunch and type while I work. It’s 10 times worse at home. I’ve never been more aware that my butt doesn’t cushion me as well as it used to. Here’s to getting older!

Went with the little one to the local farmer’s market. Everything was drive thru, all cash, all gloves and masks, and super different. That said, it was really nice to leave the house for a while and support some local farmers and businesses. We always buy from The Cheese People (their business and their name) among others. This might be a regular thing every Wednesday.

We have been lucky enough to eat well and have a wide variety of meals during quarantine. I’m grateful that the offspring are not picky eaters. You can only make so many sandwiches and soups before you start to lose it. That’s how you end up with spaghetti subs and raspberry soup.

#stayinside

Also, now that we have some 70+ degree weather coming, I feel a hashtag change coming.

#staysafe

Day 62: We celebrated the little one’s half birthday today. We are really stretching for theme ideas. She, however, celebrated just the same. Games, her choice of stories, her choice of meal (more on this later), a Rice Krispie treat, and a half birthday song. Both girls received presents, care of Grandma Cupcake. Overall, the offspring enjoyed the day and the random festivities.

We finished planting the vegetable garden last night. If I see one animal get in there through the fence, I will leap the deck railing and plummet like a bowling ball from heaven bringing death and destruction. No one eats my cucumbers this year except me and maybe the unit.

The little one asked for Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. We decided that was ok. When we went to order we discovered that they did not have naked tenders, basically the only thing guaranteed safe from her egg and nut allergy. Luckily, yesterday I baked some thighs for dinner. So, we pulled the old switcheroo. I’d feel a little bad except her dinner consisted of 1 & 1/2 entire chicken thighs, 8 ounces of applesauce, a cup of mandarin oranges, a Rice Krispie treat, and a cup of water. She clearly enjoyed herself. After she ate a pound and a half of food, she asked for more. I mean, my goodness, she eats like there is no tomorrow. We need a second stimulus check just to set aside funds to feed her.

#staysafe

Day 63: I left the house for the second time this week! Picked up a graduation banner to hang up at work. It’s beautiful and relatively inexpensive for such a large, durable banner. I may have to make this a thing. Banners for every occasion. Birthday? Banner. Anniversary? Banner! Game Night? BANNER! New outfit? TEN. FOOT. OUT. DOOR. FREAKIN’. BANNER!!

Parental units just finished a social-distancing-safe visit. We shared a 10-feet-apart meal and a safety beer (the new name for when you drink a beer with family during quarantine. Beerantine? Miller Quarantime?). Really good to see their faces. The offspring can’t wait to give hugs again. That will be a really nice moment when it happens.

The older one has a really nice swing on the t-ball set. She hit a whiffle ball over the fence from the middle of the back yard. The younger one has got a good arm. She can throw a good 15-20 feet on one hop. We need to work on direction. I had to retrieve the ball from under the car 3 times. The car in the garage. I was standing almost in the street.

#staysafe

P.S. Today is officially 2 months in quarantine. At least another 2 weeks to go! Do your part. Think of the people who can’t fight this virus as you can. Stay home.

I will continue this project for as long as we are in quarantine. I find the process cathartic. If you have not been keeping a journal of your thoughts, I encourage you to start.

God bless.

Stay safe.